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It is always fascinating when one has the opportunity to treat an entire family spanning three or more generations. Often the same remedy may be needed within the family and in practice I find this happens most frequently with the parent-child relationship. I have also observed that the level of pathology seems to deepen and show itself sooner with each successive generation. Whereas the great-grandparents and grandparents have often died of old age after enjoying reasonably good health, this is less often true of the parents whose health is already deteriorating by middle age and the children may show symptoms earlier still. The following cases illustrate these points and at the same time give some fascinating insights into one of our greatest new remedies – Hydrogen. What I considered to be the simple language or themes of Hydrogen are highlighted with italics. Underlining indicates that the same phrase was repeated.
THE MOTHER
Aged 64 but looks much older. Heavy build. Very pale, almost ghostly, with thinning grey hair. She cannot sit in the consulting chair, she needs a higher chair to be comfortable. She is wearing a plain silver cross on her lapel.
First visit: 4/9/97
PC (Presenting Complaint): Severe rheumatoid arthritis, which began 35 years earlier.
Medical history:
History of very painful menses prior to birth of her daughter and cystitis. In her early 20s had severe back pain and foot pain which was treated with steroid injections. Tendency to cold sores. Rheumatoid arthritis which started when she was 29 (6 weeks after the birth of her only daughter). Ectopic pregnancy at 32. In her late 40s, had to have her knee drained. Treated with cortisone. Two years later broke both her tibia and fibula. In her early SOs had a knee replacement. Smoker until 52. Widowed at 60 when her alcoholic husband had a brain haemorrhage.
Said she was told after the diagnosis (of RA) that she would end up in a wheelchair, to which she replied: “I won’t”. She has had a lot of alternative therapy in the past, but no classical homoeopathic treatment.The rheumatoid arthritis symptoms are now as follows:
Shoulder, no power, sore < moving it a certain way. L. arm, swollen and stiff. R. elbow, loose and hard to hold up R. forearm (she has to use her L hand). R-sided neck pain, severe and sharp when turning head. Mind, fear of losing balance. Generalities, < standing up. R. wrist, swollen and terribly sore. Fingers hard to bend > constant exercise. Generalities, stiffness and energy both < damp, can predict the rain.
Above symptoms. ameliorated most by aspirin.
Generals, energy only 3/10. Has a nap l-3pm. Has lie-ins.. “Can’t get weight off me – I’m too greedy” in relation to this lack of will power she says: “I could kill myself / I could kick myself”. Female ; vagina; dryness.(RA started in her R. big toe joint. Then R&L ankles.)
No strength to pick grandchild up. “…would love to be able to then she wouldn’t get away so fast.””I’d love to be more useful. Years go by so fast. Lucky I was a sit at home person. I’m happy if I can get from A–Z” (note not the usual A-B!). Of her suffering she says: “It’s made me more sympathetic””I looked after homeless lads, liked giving a helping hand; the worse they were the easier I found them.” (Ran large hostel for the social services, had to give it up after a recent burglary because her daughter was so concerned for her welfare. She now lives with her daughter, son-in-law and grandchild).
“I like a very simple ljfe; being alone; doing what I want to; just the basics. Don’t want a holiday or a new dress. I feel strongly about people telling tales; I’d never repeat stories.””Recently I had a dream of a horse trying to break in.” (She believes this represents hasty news). Her dead husband was trying to pull the horse back and she was trying to latch the door .
(I thought this might be a presentiment of her own death).
THE AUNT
Whilst taking down the family history the strange tale of her sister emerged. She (“was different from me, very glamorous and liked fancy clothes and fast cars”) got some rare disease started to go blind and “in one year aged to become a little old woman; then she died.”
The mother’s disease was so crippling that it had also made her old before her time.Her daughter came to see me a few days later and told me the extent of her mother’s good works. She devoted her life to looking after everyone at the hostel. She regularly lent the men money and paid their court fines to stop them being imprisoned, She also said her mother had had a severe episode of depression about a tax bill. The problem had seemed huge to her and she had got very low.
THE GRANDPARENTS
Interestingly, the daughter also told me her mother’s parents “never knew there was any evil in the world”. They were very poor because they used to work for no pay. Eventually her mother’s father took to his bed with depression because he felt he couldn’t do anything and was no longer useful . He died in his 70s. It seemed likely that her mother’s father, the sister (who aged and died prematurely) and possibly her mother too all needed the same remedy… Hydrogen.Prescribed split dose of Hydrogen 30c bedtime and rising.
Rubrics
Mind;Time passes too quickly, appears shorter
Mind; Benevolence
(possibly) Mind; Dreams of animals (because of the connection with haste)
Follow-up 2/10/97
Shoulder, Definitely stronger, but pain no >. L. Arm, still painful. R. Elbow a bit >, can lift it without it flopping. R-sided neck pain, a lot >. Mind, fear of losing balance >. Not as frightened of falling. A lot > and standing up is easier. R, wrist, less swollen and not as painful. Fingers fine, except middle finger R. hand, easier to bend. Generalites, no change in the fact both stiffness and energy < damp and can still predict the rain. Generalities, energy now 6/10 (ie. Double). Female ; vagina; dryness >> Feet and ankles were stiff after rx but a lot > now.
New symptom: Joints are creaking.
Also: Sleep is >, doesn’t take so long to get off. Very exciting dream of winning a prize on a white horse.”Forgot to mention I had restless feet with sensation as if electricity running through them” this has totally >>. I have found this symptom of electrical sensations in two other Hydrogen cases.
28/11/97
Repeated remedy as she got a cold with pains in ears, face and chest all >>.
Follow up 13/11/97
“Fine. Still have ‘a chest’ but I feel freer, not stitched up. I have a red patch under my L. arm (new symptom) hoping it’s the thing coming out (she is well-versed in the direction of cure!) that shoulder is a lot freer. Just itchy, not painful.”Also slight eruption (under the R. axilla) and a few blotches on her chest. “Sleep was a little restless last night for the first time in a long time, but I’ve been a thousand times worse than I am now”. A further improvement in balance. Indigestion is less than before.”I’d definitely say it’s working, when I first came in my R. hip and knee seemed to be getting worse but they’re fine now. When I came in I was going down.” Energy? 6/10. Power returning to R. shoulder and elbow. Severe neck pain >>Action: No remedy, wait.
Follow-ups 11/12/97 & 29/1/98 & 18/5/98
Eruptions on upper body clearing now, similar eruptions on the ankles. Continues to make steady progress; more freedom of movement with less pain. “Everyday I’m not suffering as much.” She is able to play with her grand-daughter. Says she used to feel terrible if she caught a cold, but catches them less frequently and doesn’t feel bad in herself. She “got over the Winter” and feels really pleased about it. She has given up taking Bicarb. (no more indigestion). She still occasionally has trouble sleeping if she has an appointment early the next day. When I ask her for permission to write up her case she is very enthusiastic about it “I’d love to be of some use. I’m thinking of donating my carcass to medical students when I go.” Before she leaves she says: “I’ve been saying for a thousand years that there must be something somewhere on the earth to cure everyone if we could find it.”The following week I took her daughter’s case:
DAUGHTER
Aged 35, married with 4 year old daughter.
Striking similarities in the case. Severe stabbing back pain in herearly 20s. History of cystitis and dysmenorrhea > since birth of daughter (menses now regular, light and short). Reproductive problems (9 years trying to conceive, finally managed it with fertility treatment: Clomed; IUI and injections). Caesarean delivery, lost 2 pints of blood. Followed by severe post-natal depression (treated with Gamanil). PC: Having difficulty conceiving second child.
Begins by telling me what it was like growing up in a hostel with 20 homeless men, including a schizophrenic who had changed his name by deed poll to Jimmy Gibberish. He had the room next to hers and used to speak nonsense to himself all night.
She says “There are a billion stories. That’s only the tip of the iceberg. My father (an ex-boxer) would get angry and shout at them. There was a lot of tension trying to keep the peace.”Has never been well since birth of her daughter. No interest in anything and desires to be left alone. Libido is poor, but has intercourse two or three times per month around ovulation time to try to conceive again. Energy is better now than during the post-natal depression.
She feels < at night and tends to “whinge” then. She gets cravings for chocolates, biscuits and crisps at night (2-3am). It is comfort eating and gets < when her daughter won’t sleep. (Her daughter has eczema and often has restless nights). “During post-natal depression had suicidal thoughts and would put my foot down in the car and drive recklessly. Thought I might take pills, I was too much of a coward to do anything physical.” A concomitant symptom of the depression was a very itchy scalp and itchy eyes. (She laughs) “I’m a person with everything really, very privileged compared to so many, so lucky really. Felt guilty about giving up work. Worthlessness. Was offered a job share said ‘No’, but thought other people can cope.” Spells out words in shorthand on her fingers as we talk. (I later notice her mother does the same thing although she doesn’t know shorthand, she says she is counting) I ask what she’s spelling. It is: “I’m spelling words”. It is an involuntary nervous habit that can get very repetitive.She learnt shorthand when she was a secretary in London. During that time other colleagues were on strike and she often had to cross a picket line. She said it was horrible because she felt such sympathy for the strikers. She also says how very sorry she feels for the Royal Family (it is just after Diana’s death). She co-facilitates a bible study evening with a nun. She finds this very difficult as she feels “unworthy in front of the group. I think about giving up but then I’m racked with guilt and feel I’m letting everyone down.””My mother killed a duck once and I asked her why she had done it and she said ‘why did it come to me?’ My mother hated animals.” (Hydrogen has Dreams; animals suffering and eating live animals. I also have one other case of Hydrogen with cruelty to animals).”I had two strong parents and I’m all wibbly wobbly. My cousins are very assertive and unshockable; they’re not panicky, not all up in the air””I’m over-sensitive to what people say, I misconstrue and ponder on things.” If she is worrying (eg. if she has to play music at an event next day) she sometimes can’t sleep until the dawn. She dreams frequently of: being unprepared for exams; travelling to get away from something or someone; someone is in pursuit and I’m trying to go fast, I’m often on a boat too near the water or hanging on outside the boat (the land is close by); riding a bike on the motorway (represents problems with speed/pace of life); I have a bad sense of direction and I’m trying to find my way home.Ear, right, noises in, as if someone is crinkling paper. This gets much worse if there is loud noise and laughter.
During her pregnancy she felt miserable and had a metallic taste in her mouth from Day 1. She had sickness and vomiting all the time. She also had a pain at the top of her right leg which meant she couldn’t swim or walk.”I’m a very untidy person, but obsessive about cleaning . My mother is very unmaterialistic and the worse (i.e. the more messy) a place is, the better I feel.”I didn’t actually repertorise this case as I was confident from her use of language and the similarities between her case and her mother’s that Hydrogen was the right choice.Remedy Hydrogen 30c Bedtime and rising.
Follow-up 7/10/97
“Feel quite well in myself and able to cope with it all. I let things wash over me instead of reacting badly. After the remedy I got itchy eyes for a few days (with blistery eruptions near the canthi)”. This is a return of an old symptom. Libido? ” (sex) wasn’t a chore”. Energy? “I’m not needing to sleep during the day. I’m able to get up and not feel shattered. I tend to do things where before I’d rest. I feel if I had another baby, I’d cope better. I feel more positive. (Her mother has tried to dissuade her from having another child because of her previous post-natal depression). I have a strong feeling for another baby, a girl, “I know her name – I’ve had the name ready for a long time.” Her daughter was given a completely different name at the last minute. The daughter and her father are both doing well on Veratrum, so there is a break in the pattern. She is perhaps saving the name for a Hydrogen child.”My memory is terrible for where I’ve put things and people’s names, even ones I know well. I get words mixed up and transpose letters.”She was more at ease with the bible study group, the spelling on the fingers is >> and so is the desire for snacks at 2am. The noises in the ear are duller as if further back.
Action: No remedy, wait.
Follow-up 4/11/97
Eyes, itching >. Head was v. itchy week before, now >. Memory where I put things >, recent past >, names no > the spelling fingers are coming back. Ear, noises in >>
Action: repeat remedy. Taking the fingers (simple unconscious gesture) as an indicator that the last remedy is running out.
Follow-up 17/12/97
“I’m very well really. My tolerance is better and I’ve got more energy. Before my last period had these sudden mood swings, both at night-time (midnight -2am). I was very tearful. Looking at things blackly. Haven’t been put down or felt I have been. That’s an improvement.” Fingers, spelling on >> Ear, noises in >> Memory >, names still difficult. Do feel > on the whole. Action: No remedy .Wait.Phone call to get permission to do this article and get an update. 12/5/98 Continues to feel well. No sign of the (Hydrogen?) child yet, though.
HYDROGEN.
…a few thoughts from the millions of things there are to be said! Hydrogen can be seen as representing the beginning of creation. Prior to the Big Bang we are told 99.99% of the Universe was Hydrogen (who was there to count, I wonder?). The Universe is still 75% Hydrogen with most of the remainder made up of Helium and all other substances account for only 1% of the total. Because Hydrogen was the first element to come from the pre-existing cosmic soup it can be said to represent a link with “the time which was before”. H. is the lightest remedy – gravity can’t hold it down. It’s the hottest when burning (like inflammable air) some say it should be named Pyrogen; it is the most explosive and expansive element. As a gas it has the qualities of being spacey, expansive, cool, airy and light. From its lofty standpoint it sees and understands the whole Universe. It focuses on the big picture. In relation to our understanding of death gleaned from NDEs (near death experiences), we know in the first stage of death the soul leaves the body and floats around; in the second stage it spins through a narrow tunnel and during the third stage emerges to a place of light, love oneness and connection with the “light of a million suns”. Hydrogen corresponds to this third stage. Hydrogen takes us higher and further than any other remedy… into the realm of God, deep into the cosmos. Hydrogen represents Spirit and Scholten says the question centres on “to be or not to be” whether to incarnate or not, whereas Helium’s conundrum accepts incarnation as a given and moves on to the next question “What is my purpose on this earth?”So if you are in this state of oneness with the Universe why in heaven’s name would you need a remedy?
To quote Jeremy Sherr: “Pathology is the right thing at the wrong time and place”. If someone who is incarnate believes themselves to be an inseparable part of the blissful cosmic soup they may soon find themselves at odds with the rest of humanity. Once they are put into a situation where they are forced to acknowledge the polarity, the dark side, the suffering they experience is too great to quantify.Quote from proving:
“There is a very fine line at this time between enlightenment and insanity – a split consciousness. The dark side is horrendous, but the positive side of the proving has been well worth it. The positive aspects are beautiful. It’s a shame we need to come down. I guess the price of going into the heavens is a trip to hell.”To get a true sense of the remedy it is best to read the entire proving. Much of the remedy gets lost if one just looks at the Repertory, but here are some edited highlights to whet the appetite!
MIND; AWARENESS heightened*
MIND; CONFLICT between higher consciousness and worldly existence*
MIND; UNIFICATION, higher consciousness with*
MIND; DELUSIONS; God; presence of God, that he is in the*
MIND; DREAMS; ascending a height*
MIND; DREAMS; high places**
MIND; LOVE; overflowing, for humanity*
MIND; DELUSIONS; beautiful; things look*
MIND; DELUSIONS; enlarged; distances are*
MIND; DELUSIONS; body; enlarged*
MIND; SPACED-out feeling***
Here we see the heavenly aspect. A joyous sense of unity and pure love. The flip side, “the trip to hell”, is the loss of the oneness, the separation, the paradise lost, the fall from grace.
Hence we find the rubrics:
MIND; DELUSIONS; downward, as if the mind were pulled*
MIND; DELUSIONS; hell; in, is
MIND; DELUSIONS; separated; world, from the, that he is
MIND; DELUSIONS; detached*
MIND; DELUSIONS; soul, fancied body was too small for, or
that it was separated from**
MIND; SUICIDAL disposition; throwing himself from; a height
MIND; DELUSIONS; dirt, dirty; that he is
MIND; DELUSIONS; diminished*
MIND; DELUSIONS; despised, *
MIND; DELUSIONS; betrayed, that she is
For this reason the remedy may suit those who have huge mood swings from high to low (it’s an up/down remedy).Hydrogen is timeless; it has only one shell and therefore almost no boundaries. Once boundaries are introduced they create a sense of hurriedness as timelessness gives way to the constraints of time in daily life. This is very well illustrated by the cases of the mother and the aunt.
MIND; POSTPONING everything to next day*
MIND; MISTAKES, makes; time, in*
MIND; DREAMS; hurried”’Other themes that come through very strongly in these cases are:the desire to be of service to others and the feelings of guilt and unworthiness if they are unable to fulfill this purpose; the belief in humanity; the lack of interest in material possessions; and the big, huge, nay dare I say, massive use of language. You can tell a Hydrogen not to exaggerate a million times and it makes no difference!
Comparative Materia Medica
Remedies that could look like Hydrogen: Thuja; Cann-I; Cocculus; Sepia.
My thanks to Jeremy Sherr and The Dynamis School for Hydrogen and their many other provings and to all those who have produced provings. I hope this quote will inspire us all to take part in many more:
“I’ve been saying for a thousand years that there must besomething somewhere on the earth to cure everyone if we could find it”.
©Mary Aspinwall